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James Gregory
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"Middle East Position"
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James Gregory

Greetings!

Well!  Believe it or not, there's now a new category of voters to be catered to - "Wal-Mart Moms." I kid you not! USA Today has explained who they are. These are women who don't really pay much attention to presidential politics until just before the election. "Wal-Mart Moms" usually make up their minds who to vote for just one or two days before Election Day. If the voting is close, these "Wal-Mart Moms" could sway the election. Oh, please! I'm so tired of it all!

For months now, we've been told - and hear constantly - that to win the presidency Barack Obama and Mitt Romney must appease and cater to every category of voters with an axe to grind. It's a long list... including women, soccer moms, single moms, working moms and the aforementioned "Wal-Mart Moms." And, of course, African Americans, the black community and the gay community. And they can't win without the Latino vote, the Hispanics.

You know who's not on that list? Heterosexual white males. Why is that? Do they not count? I know they exist, I personally know of at least two of them. They're friends of mine.

One is a conservative. He drives an eight-cylinder gas-guzzling Ford F150 truck. The only bumper sticker he has simply says "Back Off". To him, sensitive means his tooth hurts. He is aware of Clint Eastwood and his favorite movie is "Dirty Harry." I saw him a few days ago. He and his two sons, ages 14 and16, were on their way to a "shooting range" but stopped by Chick-Fil-A for lunch.

The other one is a liberal. He drives a Volvo. His bumper sticker says "Animals are People Too." To him, sensitive means you can't help but cry when hearing Barbra Streisand sing "The Way We Were." He's aware of Paul Newman and his favorite salad dressing is "Raspberry Vinaigrette." I don't get to see him too often. He's usually out with his wife somewhere, browsing for antiques or recycling something.

Both of those guys are my friends. I love 'em. I'm not too embarrassed to say that I know a lot of heterosexual white males. And you shouldn't be embarrassed either. And neither should Obama or Romney. After all, they're citizens too. Maybe their votes could sway the election.

The U.S. Attorney Eric "Fast and Furious" Holder says requiring a photo ID in order to vote is "an unfair burden on minority voters." They can't participate in the political process; they are disenfranchised. Really? I think it's much ado about nothing.

Here's the way I see it. Those who don't have a photo ID can't purchase, lease, rent or drive a vehicle. They can't register into a hotel or get through security clearance to get on a plane. Without a photo ID they can't even open a bank account or cash a check or be approved for a loan. And I'm assuming most of those folks don't drink or smoke because, in most areas, a photo ID is required to purchase alcohol or tobacco. Bless their hearts!

We should all have sympathy for those who have no photo ID. Not because they can't vote once every few years, but because evidently, they can't do anything else. They can't even purchase a gun unless they have to deal with a thug on the street or deal with Eric Holder. As I recall, Holder was in the gun smuggling business for a while.

In recent months, we've heard the slogan, "Bin Laden is Dead and General Motors is Alive!" So? I wrote one also, "Terrorism is Alive and Well and Saturn Motors is Dead." So? Slogans are like nursery rhymes. They're simplistic, so as to influence people with child-like amusement who have not yet heard anything about the real world. There's a reason children aren't allowed to vote.

Until next time,
God bless everybody and God bless America!

James Gregory Tour Dates
Coming up, I'll be in Alabama, South Carolina, Georgia, North Carolina and Tennessee. If you're going to be attending one of my shows, please stop by before or after and say hey. Click here for details. -James


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Beef Stew for the Brain
Beef Stew for the Brain, is my best ever. A full hour-and-a-half, including bonus features and extras.

The entire project was filmed in high definition and includes the most requested comedy routine of all time the Fat Woman After Dinner.

We're more excited about this than any in the past. This DVD would not be available if not for my good friends John Boy & Billy on The Big Show.

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